So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
