that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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