3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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