i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
