I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
