This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
