The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
