Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
