would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
