is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize