Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
