You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
