I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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