4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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