I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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