I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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