I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize