South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
