I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
