wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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