I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
