I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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