Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
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