I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
