Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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