she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
