Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
