how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
