You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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