well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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