so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
