I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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