I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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