Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
