Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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