Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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