the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
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