so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!