dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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