Whod you bang
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
