Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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