grandma shit on top of the toilet
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
