oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
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