he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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