i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
