is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
