after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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