The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
