You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
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I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
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