Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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