youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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