Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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